Say Cheese

Today is picture day at school. Son freaked out this morning. Said he couldn't go to school. Said he didn't want to go to school. Stomping/jumping on the bottom stair, arms flapping (which we haven't seen in months). "I just can't do it. There is no way we will be able to get everything done today because of pictures. The day will be DIFFERENT!"

OK, breathe Mom. Yes, Son is melting down. Two choices - get moving, we don't have time for this; which will ensue a bigger meltdown and not effectively solve the problem OR stop, breathe, model for Son, and ask what is really bothering him. Be a good Mom. Pick 2nd option.

"Yes, the day will be different."

"I don't like different. We have a lot of different at home now."

"Yes, we do. And now it will be different today at school too. But tomorrow will be back to the regular schedule at school." Begin some sensory deep pressure, make sure voice is quiet. Validate his feelings.

Son is stressed. He didn't do well on a math test and he is upset about that. I started my part-time job and Dad had him yesterday afternoon. Oh - and we are moving. Did I forget to mention that? Not far - just a few neighborhoods over. But we've been looking at houses. We've been packing up and fixing a few things around our house trying to get the house up on the market for this weekend. My big research paper was due last week. Yea, it's been hectic around here. We've noticed A LOT of verbal stemming and sensory bouncing. I've gone back to giving agenda's verbally. I've gone back to making sure he gets his swinging on the tire swing, jumping on the trampoline. He needs them right now. He's under stress. Who wouldn't be. But he deals with stress differently.

Someone on a board I'm on linked this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f15JexiQt4U

It's very well done. Everyone has stress. Everyone has to deal with it. My son is only 9. He's still learning tools to cope with stress. And he deals with stress differently from most kids. It's my job to teach him how to deal with life and what it hands you. He's under stress right now. Who wouldn't be.

Just because he deals with stress differently does not mean he can't be successful. It's my job to help him become successful. When dropping him off at school this morning he thanked me for helping him solve his problem. I think he's going to be just fine.