tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-75593155767905749942024-03-13T08:14:51.419-04:00My Life As It IsMom of son with Aspergers, Anxiety and ADHD;
Wife to my best friend;
BCBA/ABA Therapist and Consultant;
Enjoys bike riding, jogging, and readingUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger320125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7559315576790574994.post-35065961254193977392011-10-26T21:26:00.006-04:002011-10-26T21:38:44.849-04:00Lost Edens by Jamie Patterson<div><div><div><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-4pAJ50bOqow/Tqi1RlFekkI/AAAAAAAAAck/612paR5RJv0/s1600/lost_edens_cover2.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; width: 140px; height: 200px; text-align: center; display: block; cursor: pointer;" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5667979444663259714" border="0" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-4pAJ50bOqow/Tqi1RlFekkI/AAAAAAAAAck/612paR5RJv0/s200/lost_edens_cover2.jpg" /></a><em>In <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Lost-Edens-Story-Jamie-Patterson/dp/1592983863">Lost Edens </a>, author Jamie Patterson struggles to save her marriage which may or may not be already over. Keeping her attempts a secret from her family, she attempts to mold herself into the wife her husband wants her to be.</em><br /><br />And she really, really kept her attempts a secret from her family. Her story is familiar to so many others we read in fiction, watch on Lifetime movies, and hear other Moms talk about at playgrounds. It’s a timeless story told generation after generation. I know that in my family there are women who stayed in unhealthy marriages for a variety of reasons – culture, tradition, generation expectations, children, and financial. Probably in yours too. They become victims of so many things.<br /><br />But each story has two sides. There is someone in the relationship doing the abuse. And one has to wonder how they got to that point. No one (in their right mind) raises their child to be the one giving the abuse in a relationship. In most cases, this person thinks its ok because they’ve been raised with this relationship modeled. Or because they have a mental illness of some kind that effects their ability to have positive and healthy relationships with significant others.<br /><br />Traditionally, women are the victims and men the abusers. I don’t have a daughter. But that does not mean I’m off the hook on having certain conversations of what to look for and look out for in a relationship. I still have them with my son. But from a different perspective: as a male and as a person with a disability. My son is diagnosed with Aspergers, Anxiety, and ADHD. All which can lead to a social nightmare, from either end of a relationship. He’s at a higher risk for unhealthy relationships whether it be friends or significant others, and from both sides of a relationship. He’s doing very, very well right now.<br /><br />But I can’t let my guard down. I never know when a bump in the road will happen, and his bumps can have really bumpy consequences. And more serious consequences the older he gets.<br /><br />He’s in middle school and has FB and a cell phone. And yes, I do monitor these. He knows I do, but doesn’t see me doing so, so he has no idea how often. But if I see unhealthy conversations, or iffy conversations, we talk about it immediately. He is interested in girls. And I want him to have a healthy relationship with them. I want him to be able to read the nonverbal signals he gets. I want him to engage in a socially acceptable way.<br /><br />In so many ways, this is a much more important curriculum for him than the core academics he learns in school. What do you do to facilitate healthy relationships that your children have?<br /><br /><em>As a member of From Left to Write book club, I received a copy of this book for review. You can read other members posts inspired by <a href="http://lostedens.com/">Lost Edens by Jamie Patterson </a>on book club day,October 27 at **<a href="http://www.fromlefttowrite.com/">From Left to Write</a>**</em></div></div></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7559315576790574994.post-50201281391685375852011-07-15T22:46:00.000-04:002011-07-15T22:49:12.402-04:00Things I Like About Me!My friend <a href="http://www.ciaomom.com/">C. Mom </a>gave her readers a challenge. To create a list about what we all like about ourselves. Why make a list about what we like about ourselves? Because we are often too hard on ourselves. We don’t give ourselves enough credit. Therefore, it’s past due time to celebrate ourselves. What we like about ourselves. Our strengths.<br /><br />So, here goes. My list:<br /><br />• <strong>My relationship with my husband</strong>. He is my absolute best friend, and has been since we met 20 years ago.<br />• <strong>My relationship with my son</strong>. So wanted and loved. I couldn’t imagine my life without him. He brings me endless joy. A common thing I’ve heard from several of his teachers is how well we are matched. We just get each other.<br />• <strong>Motivation</strong>. I am definitely motivated. Well, when I’m not sleeping from CFS/POTS/FM. Before that diagnosis I was always on the go. I mean, who in their right mind decides to do their first year teaching, get a masters and gestate a baby all in the same year? Wait, maybe that’s not motivation, maybe that’s craziness…<br />• <strong>Patient</strong>. I am. Not sure where this trait came from, but patience I definitely have. It’s kinda required for my job. But, the rewards for being patient in my field are so incredibly rewarding and big.<br />• <strong>Positive thinker</strong>. I’m definitely a glass is half full vs. half empty kinda person. I simply find it’s easier to go thru life thinking positively. It makes you happier. It makes those around you happier. It takes less energy than thinking half empty.<br />• I’m starting to like <strong>my ability to relax</strong>. I used to consider this wasting time. Seriously. Why just sit on the couch and flip thru family sitcoms when you could be learning, communicating, doing something, anything! After my CRF/POTS/FM diagnosis I had no choice but to slow down. And I’m starting to like my ability to slow down and take some time to do nothing.<br />• <strong>Getting paid</strong> for what I love to do. I mean really, how much better can it get? I job by my definition that’s a dream job, that I worked and trained hard for, that I wouldn’t trade for the world. And I get paid on top of this?!?<br />• I like (and hope others see this quality in me) <strong>my trustworthiness and ability to listen</strong> when a friend needs it.<br /><br />What do you like about yourself? Go ahead. <a href="http://www.ciaomom.com/things-i-like-about-me/">Make a list and link up to C.Mom!! </a>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7559315576790574994.post-67506207229999069012011-06-29T22:21:00.000-04:002011-06-29T22:31:59.814-04:00Beside Still Waters - Book Blog Tour<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-v-AaH02uBwU/TgveK-zDsfI/AAAAAAAAAcU/so7vkpRCjKQ/s1600/BesideStillWatersSM.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 130px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 200px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5623832839939404274" border="0" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-v-AaH02uBwU/TgveK-zDsfI/AAAAAAAAAcU/so7vkpRCjKQ/s200/BesideStillWatersSM.jpg" /></a><br />I grew up in a very religious household. Every Sunday we went to church. Mom was in the choir. Both Mom and Dad held various positions on the various committees, including Deacons and Treasurer. It didn’t matter whether use kids wanted to go or not – it simply wasn’t an option. We were to go every Sunday, all year long.<br /><br />I’m not sure when exactly I started questioning religion, as probably most of us do at some point in our lives. I do remember being somewhat scared to question it though. What if I was stuck down?!? What if I was punished for doubting?!? What if I didn’t agree with my parents religious views?!?<br /><br />It wasn’t until I was away at college that I stopped attending. Mom couldn’t ‘make’ me anymore. Nothing happened. Then I returned home for summer. My summer job was working at restaurant. Often on Saturday nights. Until 3ish in the morning. I didn’t make it to church much that summer. Despite my Mom’s obvious displeasure, nothing once again happened.<br /><br />After I was convinced it was ok to not attend church, say the Lord’s Prayer each day and other religious traditions I was grew up expected to do daily or weekly, I started really thinking about religion. What it meant. What it meant to my family. And most of all, what it meant to me. As Sociology major I chose to take Sociology of Religion as an elective. I also babysat for a Hasidic Rabbi’s family all thru college, as well as several of the families in that community.<br /><br />What I learned was that it was ok not to have the same exact religious views as my parents. It is OK if I am not as religious as them, just as it would be OK if I was more religious than them.<br />Sometimes realizing that the values and thoughts that we were raised on are OK to alter is a scaring and daunting task. In fact, it is even OK to alter them completly!<br /><br />This is exactly what Marianna Sommers is going through in <a href="http://www.triciagoyer.com/contemporaryfiction.html#BesideStillWaters">Beside Still Waters by Tricia Goyer.</a> Questioning how her parents have raised her in her Amish community. Questioning her feelings towards what she thought she was expected to do when she grew up against possibly changing those plans and the outcome it may bring to her, her childhood crush, a new potential for a husband, and her family.<br /><br />A huge fan of Amish fiction, it was easy for me to relate to Marianna’s dilemma. Goyer's writing style is easy to read and a perfect summer book to keep in your pool bag. This is one book you definitely want to add to your reading list, whether you are a fan of Amish fiction or not. I’ll be checking the book stores for the sequel to this book to see what Marianna decides to do!<br /><br /><em>I wrote this review while participating in a blog tour by Mom Central Consulting on behalf of the Beside Still Waters Campaign and received a copy of the book and a promotional item to thank me for taking the time to participate.</em>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7559315576790574994.post-72212397643423817152011-06-22T21:35:00.000-04:002011-06-22T21:45:33.301-04:00ToesEach summer we bring out the sandals and show our feet. Which always makes me more observant of feet.<br /><br />OK. You're probably thinking where I'm going with this.<br /><br />When I started dating my husband 20 years ago, I noticed he could spread his toes apart and back - opening spaces inbetween his toes. I thought it was some kind of trick. I thought it was something unique to him. Because I can not do that with my toes. He thought I was being silly. But really. I can't.<br /><br />So I started paying more attention to other peoples toes. Especially in the summer when they're more observable. Seems most people can stretch their toes. Move them up and down. Stretch them wide apart from each other. I still couldn't.<br /><br />20 years later, I can slightly spread out my toes on my left foot. This is after TWENTY years of working on it. Yes. I actually work on this. Not like on a regular schedule, or something to put on my to do list. But I did work on it.<br /><br />But my right foot? Nothing. I tell my toes to move apart. And nothing happens. They move up and down, but will.not.spread.apart.<br /><br />And I've yet to meet anyone else who shares my predicament.<br />And each summer I once again become more aware of it.<br /><br />Honestly, it doesn't bother me. I'm just more perplexed that my feet don't do this.<br />I also wonder how alone I am in this foot feature.....Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7559315576790574994.post-59190947007568649642011-05-30T18:45:00.001-04:002011-05-30T18:45:09.658-04:00A Weekend Getaway<span xmlns=''><p>Yes we did. We got a way for the weekend. Well, half the weekend. But we went away without Adam.<br /></p><p>We went away three years ago for a night. That's how long it took my parents to be willing to watch him again. <br /></p><p>We didn't go far – actually just about 30 minutes away. But we went to a hotel that was somewhat fancy and more catered to adults. And we went to a restaurant that was somewhat fancy and more catered to adults. And we did lots of sitting around talking and sipping wine and eating good food. It was nice. It was more than nice. And we had a little more than 24 hours without Adam. <br /></p><p>The first time we went away I'll admit it was a little hard to enjoy myself. All the 'how's Adam?' doing thoughts kept popping in my head. This time I definitely enjoyed myself. When a 'how's Adam?' thought came into my head it was quickly answered with a 'he's fine, and if he's not at the moment, he'll have to get over it'. <br /></p><p>Which, unfortunately he waited until 24 hours after we got home to get over it. Seems he only got a few hours of sleep the night we were gone. He spent most of it sitting in our bed, watching TV, playing on FB, IPad and with the cat. To stressed out to sleep. And then a full day at the water park with his cousins and then a cookout yesterday and he crashed. And then this morning he melted big time. He was just angry and moody. <br /></p><p>To which I responded by suggesting perhaps he needs more practice spending the night without Mommy and Daddy (on our terms, not his – a sleepover at the neighbors). He didn't like the idea. Hubby and I did.<br /></p></span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7559315576790574994.post-39347719602289399702011-05-18T08:51:00.000-04:002011-05-18T08:56:54.718-04:00Where's The Balance?Because seriously, I can't find it.<br /><br />If I'm having a good week (ie - not in a flare), I work tons. Because I love my work. But then other things like exercise to to the wayside.<br /><br />If I'm having a good week, I do lots of housework. Because I love a clean house.<br /><br />If I'm having a good week, Adam is really organized, and has his HW in his bookbag the night before school to make the morning rush earlier. Because I have the energy to make sure he does.<br /><br />If I'm having a good week, I get to talk with my husband. Really talk, not just who's picking Adam up, who's taking care of this and that. Because I have the energy to make sure we connect.<br /><br />But I can't say I really have good weeks. Because a good week would mean all of this is getting done. And it's not. Even when I think I'm having a good week. By the end, the 'to do' list is still huge and family time has been cut short.<br /><br />Let's not even talk about 'me' time. I don't even remember what that really is!<br /><br />To make mattters worse, I have at least 3 major projects I want to get started. Really, truly wanted to get started, and they are going to all be time consuming, but I've been wanting to do them for years and the itch to do them is getting really itchy!<br /><br />So, help me blogworld. How do you find balance to get everything to fit?Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7559315576790574994.post-32859320612498480342011-05-04T09:40:00.000-04:002011-05-04T09:45:42.962-04:00A New BeginingPlease, - someone invent something to stop time!! Because seriously - MAY?!?<br /><br />As you've noticed I've been gone again. Had some personal stuff going on that I won't be blogging about, but happy to report it's all cleared up and I'm back.<br /><br />The focus of this blog will be changing some. I'm not exactly sure how yet though. I'm no longer comfortable blogging about Adam's Aspergers. He's in middle school, and now it's his story to tell if he wishes to. Which is going to make this blog, um, well, have to take a new turn since most of what I blogged about was parenting him. I'm sure he'll still be making some appearances here and there though.<br /><br />So that leaves me a little speechless in what to write. Bear with me as I find my new voice here.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7559315576790574994.post-56508894327847512152011-03-08T22:03:00.001-05:002011-03-08T22:10:26.899-05:00Lyrics<span xmlns=""> <p><span style="font-family:arial;">I'm in the car quite a bit. And I'm always listening to music while I drive. And singing (because no one else can hear me – and this is a good thing – trust me). When you hear a song enough times you pick it up and most of the time I'm just singing along, not really thinking about it – just singing.<br /></span></p><p><span style="font-family:arial;">But every now and then a line or two really makes me think. Sometimes it's the tune, sometimes it's the way it fits with the music, and sometimes it's the lyrics themselves.<br /></span></p><p><span style="font-family:arial;">Lately there has been one song in particular that I can't stop singing along to. It's "</span><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8v_4O44sfjM"><span style="font-family:arial;">Jar of Hearts" by Christina Perri</span></a><span style="font-family:arial;">. And I'm not sure why. I haven't gone through a break up recently. It doesn't remind me of a relationship in the past. But there is just something about her lyrics that get me each time. </span></p><span style="font-family:arial;"></span></span><br /><span xmlns=""><span style="font-family:arial;">And who do you think you are</span></span><br /><span xmlns=""><span style="font-family:arial;">Running 'round leaving scars</span></span><br /><span xmlns=""><span style="font-family:arial;">Collecting your jar of hearts</span></span><br /><span xmlns=""><span style="font-family:arial;">And tearing love apart</span></span><br /><span xmlns=""><span style="font-family:arial;">You're gonna catch a cold</span></span><br /><span xmlns=""><span style="font-family:arial;">From the ice inside your soul</span></span><br /><span style="font-family:Arial;"></span><br /><span xmlns=""><span style="font-family:arial;">This song was on the other day when Adam was in the car with me. He asked me to turn it up - he hadn't heard it yet, but it caught his interest. After it was over he comented on it too. "Wow Mom - there something about the way she says all that, collecting a jar of hearts? Catching a cold form the ice inside your soul? Who sings that?!?"</span></span><br /><span xmlns=""><span style="font-family:arial;"><br />I'm not really sure what the point of all this was. Maye there was no point other than I like this song.</span><span style="font-family:Arial;color:black;"><br /></span><br /></span><span xmlns=""><p><span style="font-family:Arial;font-size:10;color:black;"><br /></span></p></span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7559315576790574994.post-13282874648141178982011-03-08T21:26:00.001-05:002011-03-08T21:46:51.424-05:00Am I In Holland, Italy, or Somewhere Perfect?<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-7OxYe02UCzU/TXbmMMfFU2I/AAAAAAAAAcI/RCYK_e1Vipc/s1600/Mr-Rosenblum.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 132px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 200px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5581901885356725090" border="0" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-7OxYe02UCzU/TXbmMMfFU2I/AAAAAAAAAcI/RCYK_e1Vipc/s200/Mr-Rosenblum.jpg" /></a><br /><div><span xmlns=""><br /><blockquote></blockquote><br /><p>I talk a lot about Adam, his Aspergers, and its challenges on this blog. Not to sound like a repeat of the inspirational poem <a href="http://www.our-kids.org/Archives/Holland.html">"Welcome to Holland"</a> by Emily Perl Kingsly, but do any of us really expect our journey of parenting to end up in Holland? But yet, here my family is. In the special needs category. In Holland.</p><p>But the thing is, Adam is and always has been perfect. He was perfect when I was a child and dreamed of being a Mom one day. He was perfect when hubby and I decided to become pregnant. He was perfect when I found out I was pregnant. He was perfect while I pregnant, when he was born, when he was an infant, toddler, preschooler, and in elementary school. He's now in middle school, and he's still perfect. Who he was before his diagnosis and who was the day after, and even today – he's the same person.<br /><p>But then again, he's not the same. Or maybe I'm not the same? Aspergers has changed the way we parent. It's changed our plans for Adam. It's changed our expectations of him. It's changed a lot.<br /><p>But has it?<br /><p>Didn't I always want the best for my already perfect child? Wasn't I already going to enrich, expose, teach, nurture, and love my perfect child? Wasn't this regardless of his Asperger's diagnosis? Does Aspergers define my child and my parenting, or does my Adam define my child and my parenting?<br /><p>So, am I really in Holland or am I in Italy?<br /><p>Maybe there is no way to categorize this journey I'm on. Other than to say it's perfect despite its challenges. Because, when all is said and done, isn't that what parenting is all about? A journey that's perfect?<br /><p><em>This post was inspired by the book, </em><a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0316077585?ie=UTF8&tag=froleftowri-20&linkCode=as2&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=0316077585"><em>Mr. Rosenblum Dreams in English by Natasha Solomon</em></a><em>. I received this book, along with some scrumptious shortbread cookies as a member of From </em><a href="http://www.fromlefttowrite.com/"><em>Left to Write Book Club.</em></a><em> Read how others in this book club were</em><a href="http://www.fromlefttowrite.com/"><em> inspired by this book!<br /></em></a></p><br /><p><span style="font-family:Arial;"><a href="http://www.fromlefttowrite.com/">.</span></p></span></div></a>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7559315576790574994.post-50707409775078359682011-01-06T21:06:00.000-05:002011-01-06T21:09:06.936-05:00Can't Afford Lymphedema Sleeves?You may have already seen this, but it's because we all love <a href="http://toddlerplanet.wordpress.com/">Toddler Planet </a>so much that we're helping to spread the word. Please help us to spread the word too.<br /><br /><br /><em>Cross-posted from<a href="http://toddlerplanet.wordpress.com/2011/01/05/cant-afford-lymphedema-sleeves/"> Toddler Planet</a></em><br /><br />Are you or do you know a breast cancer survivor? Please read today's post and pass it on. If you can't afford to purchase a lymphedema sleeve, gauntlet, and/or glove, and you can't manage your post-mastectomy swelling, <a href="http://www.crickettsanswerforcancer.org/">Crickett's Answer </a>and <a href="http://lymphedivas.com/">LympheDIVAs</a> want to help.<br /><br />Today, I am pleased to announce a NEW opportunity for breast cancer survivors who have had a mastectomy and/or axillary dissection of the lymph nodes due to breast cancer and have swelling of one or both arms but cannot afford the $200-$500+ cost for two sets of the compression sleeves and gauntlets that survivors with lymphedema must wear every day to keep the swelling in check.<br /><br />Although lymphedema sleeves are medically necessary, they are not covered by Medicare OR most insurance plans <a href="http://www.lymphedematreatmentact.org/">under current law</a>, and thousands of survivors go without the sleeves, needlessly suffering congestion, swelling, and pain that interferes with their normal activities.<br /><br /><a href="http://www.crickettsanswerforcancer.org/">Crickett's Answer</a>, a 501(c)3 nonprofit organization founded in memory of Crickett Julius, has just joined forces with <a href="http://lymphedivas.com/">LympheDIVAs</a> to help other breast cancer survivors who fight not just the beast that is breast cancer but also the fallout of side effects that includes lymphedema, which may limit survivors' activities. By working together, they are now able to provide needed lymphedema sleeves and gauntlets to women who need them but cannot afford them out-of-pocket or convince their insurance companies to pay for them. They do this in honor and memory of their loved ones.<br /><br /><a href="http://s28.photobucket.com/albums/c242/swaggies/?action=view&current=LDP-crickett.jpg" target="_blank"><img border="0" alt="Photobucket" src="http://i28.photobucket.com/albums/c242/swaggies/LDP-crickett.jpg" /></a><br /><br />Crickett Julius survived breast cancer only four months, but her mother and cousin are dedicated to helping other women enjoy their life post-diagnosis through <a href="http://www.crickettsanswerforcancer.org/">Crickett's Answer</a>, a 501(c)3 organization that provides wigs, mastectomy products, oncology/mastectomy/ lymphedema massage, facials, and other pampering services as a way to help women feel feminine and beautiful after losing their hair and/or breasts.<br /><br /><a href="http://s28.photobucket.com/albums/c242/swaggies/?action=view&current=LDP-rachel2.jpg" target="_blank"><img border="0" alt="Photobucket" src="http://i28.photobucket.com/albums/c242/swaggies/LDP-rachel2.jpg" /></a><br /><br /><a href="http://lymphedivas.com/">LympheDIVAs</a> was founded by <a href="http://lymphedivas.com/about-us/rachel-levin-troxell-1970-2008/">Rachel Troxell</a> and Robin Miller, friends and breast cancer survivors, who wanted to create a more elegant and comfortable compression sleeve. Rachel continued to build the company during her later recurrence. Even though she died two years ago, at the age of 37, her father, mother, and brother continue to grow the company in her honor and in the hope that <a href="http://lymphedivas.com/">LympheDIVAs</a>’ compression apparel will continue to inspire breast cancer survivors everywhere to feel as beautiful, strong, and confident as Rachel was.<br /><br />To ask for help, please download and complete the forms at <a href="http://crickettsanswer.startlogic.com/id4.html">Crickett's Answer</a>, writing in "lymphedema sleeve and gauntlet" on page 2 of the application.<br /><br />To help someone else, please copy and paste this post on your blog or email it to a friend (or your local cancer center!).<br /><br />To donate, go <a href="http://crickettsanswer.startlogic.com/id8.html">here</a>.<br /><br />To help change the law so that this medical garment is covered by cancer survivors' insurance, stay tuned for more about the <a href="http://www.lymphedematreatmentact.org/">Lymphedema Treatment Act </a>when it is reintroduced in the 2011 Congress.<br /><br />Because of these women, these three thirty-something women who didn't ask to get breast cancer, and the men and women who love them, there is now help for women who can't afford lymphedema sleeves, a medically necessary garment not typically covered by insurance. Their legacy lives on.<br /><br />Note: Cancer patients who are members of the National Lymphedema Network and who are treated by an NLN therapist can also apply to the NLN garment fund, set up in honor of <a href="https://www.lymphnet.org/patients/westbrookFund.htm">Marilyn Westerbrook</a>.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7559315576790574994.post-10786933344626006682010-10-27T21:57:00.001-04:002010-10-27T22:11:44.568-04:00How Many Maps Can Fit On One Fridge?<span xmlns=""> <p>I don't remember ever needing to know this. Or even wanting to know this. However, it seems I just might find out. Because over the past week they have been showing up on my fridge.<br /></p><br /><p>One morning last week I found this on our fridge:<br /><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_8qG7Nq0fPpk/TMjaJAgUByI/AAAAAAAAAbo/udQ_m2H0hCo/s1600/fridge+1.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 200px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 150px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5532911990513862434" border="0" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_8qG7Nq0fPpk/TMjaJAgUByI/AAAAAAAAAbo/udQ_m2H0hCo/s200/fridge+1.jpg" /></a><br />It's a map of Adam's school. I asked him why it was there. He replied, "In case I get lost at school." Never mind the fact it's the end of the first quarter and he knows his way around the school now. Never mind the fact it won't do him any good on the fridge if he gets lost, you now, at school.<br /><p>Then a few days later while getting something out to cook for dinner I saw this:<br /><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_8qG7Nq0fPpk/TMjahTSx6PI/AAAAAAAAAbw/lM9fuK3eOrM/s1600/fridge+2.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 200px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 150px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5532912407874234610" border="0" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_8qG7Nq0fPpk/TMjahTSx6PI/AAAAAAAAAbw/lM9fuK3eOrM/s200/fridge+2.jpg" /></a><br /><p>I made the mistake of asking Adam why a second map of his school was on the fridge. I got glared at. Then I saw his back walking away. Notice his choice of magnet to hold up the second map 'Stupid should be painful'. I'm wondering if this was a clue for me. </p><p><br />And this morning:<br /></p><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_8qG7Nq0fPpk/TMja2fV46JI/AAAAAAAAAb4/6FVqNhFgdgQ/s1600/fridge+3.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 200px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 150px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5532912771885754514" border="0" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_8qG7Nq0fPpk/TMja2fV46JI/AAAAAAAAAb4/6FVqNhFgdgQ/s200/fridge+3.jpg" /></a><br /><br /><p>There is the addition of a map of North America. I took a chance and asked Adam why a third map was on the fridge. I'm glad I did. I got an answer this time. "Because" was mumbled as I saw his back walk away yet again.<br /></p><br /><p>Any guesses what will show up next?</p></span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7559315576790574994.post-70768361634359226572010-09-26T20:13:00.001-04:002010-09-26T20:13:39.128-04:00ROOM<span xmlns=''><p>I have been seeing more and more attention given to <a href='http://www.roomthebook.com/inside/'>ROOM</a> , <a href='http://www.emmadonoghue.com/emmadonoghue.htm'>by Emma Donoghue</a>, <a href='http://www.fromlefttowrite.com/'>in blogs</a>, <a href='http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0316098337?ie=UTF8&tag=washpost-books-20&linkCode=xm2&camp=1789&creativeASIN=0316098337'>book reviews</a> and <a href='http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2010/09/14/AR2010091406235.html'>newspapers</a> recently. Have you? All have given it a completely amazing review and commented on the absolutely horrible situation Ma finds herself in with her son Jack. Most reviews comment on the dark plot, sadistic character of Old Nick, and disturbing topics. And while it is no doubt depressing, I was also completely amazed and in awe of Ma.<br /></p><p>So often these days we think we can't live without FB, smart phones, cable TV, internet, fast food, modern appliances – even something as simple as a washer and dryer. Our children scour thru catalogues months in advance of the winter holidays making up wish lists to pass out to relatives. We study history in school and always think, it may be fun to live in colonial days for a day or two, but wow I'm glad I didn't have to on a regular basis. Because it all looks hard and boring.<br /></p><p>And so often we all have our rough days. Whether it is because our child is whining all day and Just.Won't.Listen. Or because our car breaks down 5 miles from home with cold groceries in the trunk. Or because our partner has to go away for a week and we have to single parent. Simply put, we all have our days where we truly wish everything would just go away. <br /></p><p>But what if it did? What if you really, truly had no choice? What if you lived in a 12x12 shed with very few belongings and an infant that grows to be a 5 year old? How would you pass the time? How would you entertain, teach, and nurture your child? How would you protect your child from the person who supplies you food, electricity and clothing – the provider and also the scariest person in the world to you? How would you keep yourself sane enough to be able to show your child joy in things?<br /></p><p>What I found absolutely incredible about this most tragic situation Ma is in is that somehow she pulls together the strength to mother Jack. She gives him the love he needs and the other basics of life he needs. But on top of that she thinks creatively to give him a basic education in not just academics, but also character development. Jack is happy, and it's because of her. I'd like to think if I were in her shoes I would do the same. I'd like to think the maternal instincts of mothering would completely kick in no matter what the situation. But I just don't know. I sure do hope I'll never have to find out. <br /></p><p>I also think Ma should win Mother of the Year award. And I also think my rough days really aren't that rough.<br /></p><p><em>I received a free copy of <a href='http://www.emmadonoghue.com/room.htm'>ROOM</a>, and with no obligation to review, as part of the From Left To Write book club. To read other posts inspired by this book, check out book clubs website, <a href='http://www.fromlefttowrite.com/'>From Left to Write</a>.<br /></em></p></span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7559315576790574994.post-44217910948033350272010-09-24T10:25:00.001-04:002010-09-24T10:25:47.521-04:00Am I Spoiled?<span xmlns=''><p>Tuesday I was tucking Adam into bed (I absolutely love that at this age he Still Insists that I tuck him in each night). He says to me, "Mom, aren't you going to wish me a happy birthday week?" I ask him, "Why? Your birthday isn't until Friday."<br /></p><p> Turns out he has decided we should celebrate birthdays all week now. "Wouldn't it be fun? We could celebrate each day and make the whole week special!" <br /></p><p>He paused and thought for a minute, "Would that make me spoiled though? Because I wouldn't want to be spoiled. Then I might forget to be thankful and turn into a brat and I don't want people to think of me that way." He thought a few more seconds, "How about we just say Happy Birthday all week but only get presents on our actual birthday?"<br /></p><p>I must be doing something right <span style='font-family:Wingdings'>J</span></p></span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7559315576790574994.post-67231332072174933082010-09-15T21:45:00.001-04:002010-09-15T21:45:13.119-04:00Want to read a book?<span xmlns=''><p>Sometimes September is the easiest time for me to read – when the days slow down a bit while Adam is in school. And the great weather we've been having has certainly helped! There's nothing like rocking on the swinging bench on the front porch with a slight breeze and a good book. <br /></p><p>For the next week I'm going to catch up on letting you know the latest great books I've received to review. But for now I'm going to start with a short article from Dr. Dora Calott Wang, author of <em>The Kitchen Shrink: A Psychiatrist's Reflection on Healing in a Changing World</em><br /> </p><p style='text-align: center'><strong>Women Will Steer the Fate of Health Care Reform<br /></strong></p><p>As mothers, daughters, wives and leaders of households, women often steer the health care choices of families. Thus in the coming years, women will also be a major force toward implementing health care reform and the landmark Affordable Care Act.<br /></p><p>Whenever we enroll a child into newly available health insurance, whenever we convince parents to get mammograms or colonoscopies that will be free under Medicare in 2011, each time we appeal an insurance company's denial of care, or when we choose health insurance in new marketplaces beginning in 2014 -- we will be helping to shape the future of health care in America. In fact, much of the ACA depends upon the actions and choices of patients, with women often taking the lead.<br /></p><p>Many ACA laws are already in effect. For example, nursing mothers in most workplaces are now entitled to time and private space to pump breast milk for a child's first year of life. Did you ever think the feds would mandate this? It's a new era.<br /></p><p>The ACA's main goal is for nearly every American to have health insurance. New opportunities are already available, and uninsured members of your family may qualify. If someone in your family has been denied health insurance because of a pre-existing illness, check out the new "high-risk pool" insurance plans available now. Log onto Healthcare.gov to find local options, and get your loved one covered. Medicaid has been expanded, so someone in your family may be newly eligible. By September 23, you can insure your children under your own health plan until they are age 26, and insurance companies will have to accept all children under age 19 with pre-existing illnesses.<br /></p><p>Patients (and the women often guiding them), might possibly exert the most influence on health care reform through two important ACA measures -- appeals processes that should be in place by Sept. 23, and the new health insurance marketplaces in effect by 2014.<br /></p><p>In the words of President Obama, the ACA aims to protect patients against the worst abuses of health insurance companies. The ACA provides many safeguards against insurance companies denying coverage. Yet the devil is still in the details when it comes to holding insurers more accountable toward paying for care. To fight against insurance companies taking our premiums, then trying not to pay for medical care, the federal government is cracking down on fraud, waste and abuse. The ACA eliminates life-time caps on health insurance benefits, while mandating that insurance companies now must spend at least 85 percent of their dollars on medical care, rather than on profit and administration.<br /></p><p>We the public can do our part to keep insurance companies honest through new appeals processes which should be in place by Sept. 23 for new insurers. If you feel your new insurer is unfairly denying care, or is stalling on time-sensitive care, you will be able to appeal to the insurer itself, but also to an external review process. The ACA leaves it up to individual states to institute these appeals processes, but the federal government will hear grievances if state processes are inadequate.<br /></p><p>These appeals processes will be an all-important aspect of health reform -- which will be driven by patients making appeals, and therefore reliant upon all of us.<br /></p><p>Another crucial step is that by 2014, we can shop for health insurance in new exchanges offering comparisons between different plans. So if we see an insurance company hiking rates by 70 percent in one year, for example, or if an insurance company has a reputation of not paying for care (yes, this will still happen under the ACA), the new exchanges will offer options. Collectively, by choosing insurance for our families, we'll determine which insurers succeed or fail, and thus shape the landscape of American health care.<br /></p><p>The lady of the house has always had a large role in steering the health care choices of her family. Now with the new Affordable Care Act, the actions of women on behalf of their families will collectively shape the future of health care in America.<br /></p><p>For more information about the ACA and its timeline, log onto the excellent website, Healthcare.gov.<br /></p><p>© 2010 Dora Calott Wang, M.D., author of The Kitchen Shrink: A Psychiatrist's Reflections on Healing in a Changing World</p></span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7559315576790574994.post-75220288354868052352010-09-13T10:20:00.001-04:002010-09-13T10:20:14.057-04:00Yum, Pizza!<span xmlns=''><p>I LOVE pizza. But I'm a picky pizza eater. I grew up in CT, right outside of NYC. And I got spoiled by good pizza. Really good pizza. After moving to Hampton Roads and then NoVa, I had to adjust to the fact that if I wanted pizza, it was going to have to pretty much be chain pizza. <br /></p><p>Recently we tried <a href='http://www.zpizza.com/'>ZPizza.</a> Although it's a chain, its style is much closer to the pizza I was raised on. But that wasn't the only reason I got excited. As I've mentioned before, Adam has Celiacs. Pizza is one thing he has truly missed. I can make him a pizza at home, but when everyone else at the party or gathering is eating pizza that was delivered and you've got a pizza in a Tupperware container made by Mom, it's just not the same.<br /></p><p>ZPizza has <a href='http://www.zpizza.com/food/ingredients/'>gluten-free crusts! </a> And he LOVES them! Now on those evenings we want to order pizza we can, and we can all eat it. Gluten-free for him, Gluten for Mom and Dad. Or if he's going to a party that is having pizza, I'll pick one up from ZPizza on the way for him. It truly has been a wonderful option for him as he hits the middle school years where all those social things become even more important.<br /></p><p>ZPizza is also very health conscious. Their sauce and wheat pizza crust are organic. Tons of fresh veggies and meats to choose from to create your own pizza or choose from their huge selection of creative creations. Not in the mood for pizza or rustica's, but your family is – ZPizza also has a wide range of salads, sandwiches, pasta and calzones (these are my personal favorite).<br /></p><p>Getting in the mood to try ZPizza? If you're in NoVa, you're in luck. Tuesday, September 14<sup>th</sup>, between 4PM and 7PM the <a href='http://stores.zpizza.com/alexandria-1/'>Alexandria location</a> (6328-C Richmond Highway, Alexandria VA 22306; 703-660-8443) will be handing out free samples. ZPizza's Director of Training will be on site to answer any questions you have. And before you head out, be sure to sign up for the <a href='http://ww7.empathica.com/sxml/zpizza/eblastpilotsurvey/custsurvey.jsp?SURVEY_ENTRY='>ZTribe</a> and get a coupon for doing so!<br /></p></span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7559315576790574994.post-30174860063214756262010-09-10T07:52:00.001-04:002010-09-10T07:52:02.115-04:002:37 AM<span xmlns=''><p>Every now and then I have these moments where I feel like a genius. Except what I am geniusing about is, well, rather pathetic. But it still impresses me when I have these moments (it's the little things in life that make me happy).<br /></p><p>When I got the Droid last year I was all super happy – my first smart phone. I could do this, and this, and this and that too, and how in the world did I live without a Smartphone before! I could have constant contact to everything – email, Face book, Twitter, Google Reads, silly apps – EVERYTHING! And boy do I take advantage of it. But something I never liked about the Smartphone is that when I read blog posts in the reader I never comment – too much to click over to the blog, increase, scroll, comment on a small keyboard and all that (yea, I'm pathetically lazy too). "I'll just go back to that blog and make a comment at home" I'd innocently thing. Of course that never happens in reality.<br /></p><p>So, 3 nights ago, at 2:37 AM I had this incredibly awesome idea (this is the when I was feeling like a genius moment): I'd stop reading blogs on my Smartphone and only on my laptop. That way I could comment back!!<br /></p><p>I tell ya, I'm a genius, I am.<br /></p></span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7559315576790574994.post-86141338594800692822010-09-09T11:58:00.001-04:002010-09-09T11:58:01.614-04:00A New Year<span xmlns=''><p><span style='font-size:12pt'>School started this week for Adam. My new job as adjunct faculty at a local university also started this week. The weather seems to have taken note of this ending of summer as the mornings are cool as are the evenings. Fall is right around the corner. Our kitchen and family room remodeling construction is underway.<br /></span></p><p><span style='font-size:12pt'>So many new beginnings. It's like a new year. Wait – it is – if you celebrate Rosh Hashanah. I've posted in years back that September always seemed to be a better time for looking back and looking ahead than January. All that seems to really change in January is the date you write on your check.<br /></span></p><p><span style='font-size:12pt'>Despite this past year being a more difficult one (husband had his first overseas long-term business trip, I was on medical leave for 6 months and am still in a flare-up waiting (not so patiently anymore) for it to end) I do have so much to be grateful for. This year brings so many new opportunities for everyone in my family. New opportunities that we've all worked hard to obtain. <br /></span></p><p><span style='font-size:12pt'>L'shanah Tovah</span></p></span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7559315576790574994.post-87208919131720928472010-09-01T22:18:00.001-04:002010-09-01T22:21:44.889-04:00Limitless Love and It’s Power<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_8qG7Nq0fPpk/TH8J7z8BAvI/AAAAAAAAAbI/-3CTYyKxIAk/s1600/DSC_0002.JPG"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 200px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 133px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5512135392083641074" border="0" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_8qG7Nq0fPpk/TH8J7z8BAvI/AAAAAAAAAbI/-3CTYyKxIAk/s200/DSC_0002.JPG" /></a><br /><div><span xmlns=""><p>I've mentioned before that Adam has a <a href="http://wwwmylifeasitis.blogspot.com/2008/10/greeny-and-george.html">pet Gecko Lizard he named George, and how George came to be part of our family</a>. That post was almost 2 years ago. Wow how time flies! </p><p>George is still alive and well, and loved ever so much now as he was then. George seems to knowwhen it's Adam looking in his home. If it's me or one of Adams friends he breathes faster, if it's Adam he slows down his breathing after his startle of having realized big looming eyes are staring at him.<br /></p><p>When Adam puts his hand into the cage George climbs right into his hand. Adam takes him out, whispers sweet loving comments to him as he pets him and George rests his head on his fingers. It is truly amazing to watch this connection between Adam and George.<br /></p><br /><p>We go to the pet store weekly to stock up on crickets and mealworms. For the past 5 months or so Adam has been looking at the other reptiles. He'd love a cat or dog, but with allergies those aren't options. So he'll look at them, but he Really Looks at the reptiles. For A Long Time. And talks about how much he'd like another one. He's made it clear he loves George, but he wants more pets to love and take care of.<br /></p><br /><p>Last week Adam was rushed to the ER for severe stomach cramps. Three hours later he was in surgery for removal of his appendix. The first thing he said upon hearing he was having surgery and would be spending the night in the hospital was "But what about George? Who will feed him?" Now, George can go a day without food. He's good like that (and also helps to make him a great pet if we want to go away for an overnight trip!) Not the fact he was being put under and having an organ removed. Not the fact he wouldn't be allowed to do Tae Kwon Do for at least a month. Not the fact he was officially being admitted into the hospital. His thoughts were on George. His beloved pet. That all started with an inch worm 3 ½ years ago.<br /></p><br /><p>I do think it is time for another pet for Adam. He has once again surprised us with his level of growth – his ability to be responsible enough to take care of a pet. But not just take care of it. To love it. To reach out and have a relationship with another being. Something that's supposed to be very difficult for him seems so easy when it comes to George. As well as others he's let into his circle. He's come a long way. And all with the help from such small creatures.<br /></p><br /><p>When I was offered the opportunity to read <a href="http://www.monicaholloway.com/">Cowboy and Wills</a> from the <a href="http://www.fromlefttowrite.com/">From Left to Write</a> book club I clicked over to the author's website to see what the book was about. A boy with autism, who learns to navigate the social world along with his bestest buddy ever, Cowboy, his puppy. How in the world could I not read Ms. Holloways memoir?!? This book, a heartwarming, you won't want to put it down till you get to the end, but you don't want it to end because, well, then it would be done, touched me personally on so many levels. Thank you to Ms. Holloway for being brave enough to share Wills story so that others may see limitless love and it amazing power.<br /></p><br /><p><em>I received a complimentary copy of Cowboy and Wills, and with no obligation to review, as part of the From Left to Write book club.<br /></em></p><br /><p style="TEXT-ALIGN: center"></span></p></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7559315576790574994.post-83307037987200964522010-08-27T13:22:00.001-04:002010-08-27T13:22:32.165-04:00Bringing Back Memories<span xmlns=''><p>When Adam was in 3<sup>rd</sup> grade he studied Ancient Civilizations and was introduced to historic figures. We took him to the Children's Museum in Baltimore since they had an exhibit on Ancient Egypt. He loved the hands on activities of taking the boat across the Nile, writing in hieroglyphics and exploring a pyramid to discover a mummy. <br /></p><p>Like so many units of history and science he has studied, we love to find hands-on activities for him to supplement what he's being taught in school. Lucky for us we live in the DC area – filled with tons of museums between Baltimore and Richmond. <br /></p><p>Adam is a fairly quick learner. But when he sees and touches what he's learning, the learning is even that much faster. Often we don't need to go farther than our local bookstore or library. Just looking at a DK book or some other book with pictures helps to solidify information for him.<br /></p><p>I received <a href='http://www.figuresinmotion.com/'>Famous Figures of Ancient Times</a> by <a href='http://twitter.com/cathydiezluckie'>Cathy Diez-Luckie</a> as a member of the <a href='http://www.fromlefttowrite.com/'>From Left To Write</a> online book club. When I showed the historical figures that you could color (or use the pre-colored sets), cut and assemble he immediately said, "Remember when we went to the museum in Baltimore when I studied Ancient Egypt? That's when I started learning about the Egyptian and Greek Gods!" Later that day I found him reading one of his books about the mythical Gods.<br /></p><p><br /> </p><p><em>As I member of the <a href='http://www.fromlefttowrite.com/'>Left To Write</a> book club, I was given a complimentary copy of this book. I was not obligated to write about this book, and all opinions are mine only.</em></p></span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7559315576790574994.post-63179893545856540842010-08-16T22:10:00.000-04:002010-08-16T22:16:01.021-04:00Dinner with NO SittersYup - you heard it. We don't need sitters anymore. It's really official now.<br /><br />Our child, who couldn't name the peers he sat next to in 2nd grade...<br />Our child, who would throw 2-3 hour tantrums at the slightest change in routine....<br />Our child, who would spin, and spin, and spin nonstop rather than engage in age typical activities.....<br /><br />Our child who has worked soo very hard....<br /><br />Our child who has learned to be flexible....<br />Our child who loves when his friends come over to play....<br />Our child who is always finding kids at the pool to play with....<br />Our child who can modulate his own sensory needs....<br /><br />Stays home alone now.<br />We've been leaving him alone for short stints and slowly increasing it over the past year (he's old enough we could have been leaving him home alone for hours at a time last year).<br /><br />Tonight, for our anniversary Hubby and I went out to dinner. And we didn't need a sitter.<br /><br />Sometimes dreams do come true.<br />Sometimes the nightmares begin to slow down.<br />Sometimes it's really safe to dream some more.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7559315576790574994.post-65198321924006823632010-08-16T22:08:00.000-04:002010-08-16T22:10:39.325-04:00Does Anyone Else Have This Problem, Part III know you are all in suspense wondering what I've decided to do.<br />Grow the bangs out of course!<br />Stay tuned for Part III where I of course, decide I want bangs after all and one morning spontaneously cut them myself because if I wait for a hair appointment I might change my mind by then.<br />Ugh.<br />The endless cycle.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7559315576790574994.post-88496731030014074142010-08-07T21:18:00.000-04:002010-08-07T21:24:26.368-04:00Does Anyone Else Have This Issue?I've got bangs.<br /><br />Problem is when I have them, I don't want them. I start to think I look better without them. They require more maintance - especially since I have a cowlick just in the center of my forehead (thank goodness for straightening irons!).<br /><br />So I grow them out. And then I don't have them.<br /><br />But then I think I look better with bangs. So I get my hair cut and get bangs back.<br /><br />And about 4 months later I think, 'No, I looked better without bangs. I should grow them out.'<br /><br />Rinse, Lather, Repeat....<br /><br />Am I the only one with this issue?Unknownnoreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7559315576790574994.post-32469070586736983842010-08-03T11:32:00.001-04:002010-08-03T11:34:54.023-04:00Back To School Shopping At Target? Not!<span xmlns=""> <p>Unfortunately it's August. Which for us means Back to School Shopping. And, which for the past 6 school years have meant going to Target.<br /></p><p>Why Target? Why not. They always have what is on Adam's teachers lists. And then more. I heart Target. I really do. It's where his clothes come from. He loves that blue creatures with lots of eyes line of clothes. Heck, it's where most of my clothes come from. It's where I pick up those cute seasonal plates for him (well, not so much anymore, but when he was a kid he loved seasonally themed kid plates and bowls to eat from). Most of our house accessories come from Target. I planned on having a fun day shopping for new accessories there in September when our new kitchen finishes its total remolding. Need a few items from the grocery store – no need to go there, just pick them up at Target and no need to go to another store also. After our mortgage, I think Target is probably our biggest monthly expense!<br /></p><p>But I won't be shopping at Target this year for back to school supplies. In fact, I won't be shopping at Target at all for now. It will be hard, but I'm gonna do it.<br /></p><p>You see, I believe if you fall in love with someone, you should be able to marry them. To find someone who you share values with, good times with, makes your heart go thump, thump. To find someone you want to work out life problems with. Forever. It's so amazing when you've found that someone. It's so special when you've found that someone. I'm so grateful that I found my partner. Aren't you grateful for your partner? Shouldn't we all be allowed that same joy?<br /></p><p>I'm not so sure Target believes this though. It has been reported that <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/07/28/tom-emmer-anti-gay-pol-ge_n_662535.html">Target has donated $150,000 to Tom Emmer's campaign</a>. He is a Republican running for Governor in Minnesota. Minnesota is where Target is headquartered. </p><p>According to <a href="http://minnesotaindependent.com/60007/gubernatorial-candidates-support-gay-marriage-with-one-exception">The Minnesota Independent</a>: </p><blockquote><p>In 2007, Emmer authored a constitutional amendment to prohibit same-sex marriage and civil unions.<br /></p></blockquote><blockquote><p>In many instances, Emmer has tried to change language in bills to that same-sex couples cannot benefit. In a bill to create standards around surrogate motherhood, Emmer attempted to replace the word "parents" with the words "mother and father." In a wrongful death bill this session, Emmer questioned the use of the term "domestic partner" just as he has in bills aimed at providing benefits for same-sex partners.<br /></p></blockquote><p>Heck, here's what <a href="http://www.emmerforgovernor.com/issues/socialvalues/">Tom says on his own campaign website</a>:<br /></p><blockquote><p>I believe marriage is the union between one man and one woman. As a legislator, I have consistently supported the constitutional marriage amendment that protects traditional marriage.<br /></p></blockquote><p>So, I'm really confused. Target claims to support gay-friendly policies, including offering domestic partner benefits. However, with the money Tom's campaign received from Target, they may not be allowed to keep these benefits. Why would Target support him then?<br /></p><p>Before writing this article I did some research. I was also surprised to find out that Best Buy also contributed ($100,000) to Tom's campaign. Um….<br /></p><p>I mean, this probably shouldn't be a surprise. I'm sure lots of places I go to and give my money to support candidates that I may not totally agree with. But now this is out in the open. Target and Best Buy are supporting a very anti-gay candidate. In fact, he is the <a href="http://minnesotaindependent.com/60007/gubernatorial-candidates-support-gay-marriage-with-one-exception">only candidate running for governor that does not support same-sex marriage</a>.<br /></p><p>Once I am aware of something I can't ignore it. And this is something I truly disagree with. I truly agree that if you fall in love, and the relationship is healthy (no abuse for example) and you want to get married, you should be able to, regardless of you and your partners gender.<br /></p><p>And because of this, I am joining <a href="http://dialmforminky.com/2010/08/target-equality-gay-rights/">Dial M for Minky Moo</a> and many others in boycotting Target. At least for now. People and companies can make mistakes. But mistakes can be fixed. If Target truly does support gay's rights (as I used to think they do, but am now confused about it), they can make amends. They can donate money to <a href="http://www.hrc.org/">The Human Rights Campaign</a>. Because The Human Rights Campaign will certainly need additional funds to help fight human rights from politicians like Tom, especially is he is elected.<br /></p><p>While I do not know for sure who Walmart and other big chains support, I do know that Target has confused me who it supports on a value that means a lot to me, and for that reason I will be doing Adam's Back to School shopping not at Target this year. Will you be joining Minky Moo and I?<br /></p><p>PS – <a href="https://secure3.convio.net/hrc/site/Advocacy?cmd=display&page=UserAction&id=912">The Human Rights Campaign</a> has a button to click to take action if you are so inclined.<br /></p></span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7559315576790574994.post-46962500153616282902010-07-25T12:36:00.000-04:002010-07-25T12:43:30.033-04:00The Spectrum of HappinessThe other day I came across this <a href="http://jenniferlawler.com/wordpress/?p=747">article defining in the best possible way what happiness is.</a><br /><br />Sadly a few days later, <a href="http://www.cnn.com/2010/CRIME/07/22/texas.autistic.children.killed/index.html">this made news</a>.<br /><br />Just as with autism, there is a spectrum in how parents of special needs children are able to raise their children with happiness for who their child is.<br /><br />I only wish Ms. Akhter could have seen Ms. Lawler's post. Or that the social services that were involved with Ms. Akhter had more resources, budget and time to help her.<br /><br />Every parent should be able to find happiness with their children. There should be no Spectrum of Happiness when it comes to parenting. There should only be one spot - Happiness.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7559315576790574994.post-7340356403704002662010-07-23T23:56:00.000-04:002010-07-24T00:44:49.765-04:00Reading vs. Educational TVHere's a question for you all:<br /><br />If my son is just not in the mood to read, is it OK for him to watch educational TV (History Channel, National Geographic Channel) instead?<br /><br />The other day I told him to go watch something educational. I must have been completely out of my mind. But I was in the middle of something I couldn't stop and he was bored out of his mind. But then I got to thinking:<br /><ul><li>Well, obviously it's better than playing video games. </li><li>He's learning</li><li>He's visual - so he might even remember it better</li><li>He's learning something he may not be willing to read</li><li>Isn't some of the point of reading to learn about a topic of interest?</li></ul><p>A week ago he was flipping thru the channels at bedtime and came across a special on Hitler. WWII has been slowly becoming an interest of his. He knows he'll be studying it this year at school. And earlier in the month we watched the movie "A Diary of Anne Frank". Earlier in the spring we watched "The Boy in Stripped Pajama's". He's asked questions about that particular time period since then. He wanted to stay up and watch the special. So we let him - he watched that one, and the Part II afterwards. And then talked about it quite a bit.</p><p>And not that he'll be allowed to watch educational TV vs reading, and I'm certainly not saying his education should come primarily from video, but, what's the value of watching a special on some aspect of history or science vs reading? And if that captures his interest even more and then he wants to read up further, isn't that better than saying go read for 20 minutes because the schools say you should?</p><p> </p>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2